Monday, October 19, 2009

Contemplating....

This has been a strangely contemplative week.

I’ve been contemplating the fact that I’m one year older as of Friday. Older doesn’t really freak me out. Hating the wrinkles, but loving the confidence I have now. But now I’m just 4 years younger than my mom was when she died. Does that mean I’m within 4 years of being as wise as she was?

I’ve been contemplating something that the son of a friend said about eternity. On Monday, I had the opportunity to share the gospel with an 84-year-old woman. She was a pretty little thing, and smoked like a chimney. Her voice sounded exactly like Roz from Monsters, Inc.

Exactly. She asked me, with a little bit of wonder in her voice, if I knew that the Jews did not believe that Jesus was the Son of God. And that they (the Jews) don’t believe that Jesus is coming back. She had just come across those facts in the last day or so. Wow. Talk about an open door. Not sure if maybe, being 84, she may have known those salient facts last week and then forgot them. But wow. This is the Holy Spirit. This is the Holy Spirit saying “You asked for an opportunity—here ya go!” My friend’s son had this very poignant point: “I don’t think whoever said 'ignorance is bliss' had eternity in mind... “

And I’ve been contemplating choices made and consequences that come from those choices. I recently had the opportunity to go to the childhood home of my very best childhood friend. Her sister still lives in the home. And nothing has been changed. The wallpaper, paint and furnishings were the same. The plant room? The same. The old Chevy in the garage? The same. It was like opening a door and walking into 1974. Surreal. In those days, even though I was going to church, I was walking far from God. My friend was too. We made poor choices. We were in trouble, together and apart, but mostly together, quite often. Last year I broke my body in an unfortunate toilet papering incident at youth group. When we were 13, I broke her arm when the shopping cart she was in and I was pushing flipped over and she tumbled out. If I believed in Karma, there it was. When her parents went to the Holy Land for 6 weeks when we were high school sophomores, she lived with my family. I went on vacation with her family every summer. And then for some reason we drifted apart. I found this week that my friend, because of consequences of her bad choices, has lost her husband, has herself had a stroke, has lost any remaining trust of her family and is broke, broken and all alone. God pursued me and I was captured up in His love, His grace and His mercy. Somehow, she got away. Why? We both knew the Truth. She was a pastor’s daughter…her dad performed my marriage ceremony. Why? I know it’s all about choices. All about consequences. But…why? Why her and not me? My heart aches for her. I know that God is still pursuing her. To what lengths will she run so that He can prove His capacity for love and forgiveness to her? And why was she/is she so driven to run?

And I’ve been contemplating how incredibly blessed I am. How much God loves me. How much I am loved by my husband and family. And how can I show some of that love in return.

So…what are you contemplating these days?

1 comment:

KrippledWarrior said...

God has many children. But he has absolutely no grand-children. As you said she knows the truth. But maybe she needs a refresher. But don't alienate her, or pester her to the truth. Some times God has to hold our heads in the mud before we begin to listen. Don't get between God and one of his rebellious children who are being chastised. Except in prayer.